In the Movies Ep. 14: Entourage and TV Show Movies

Yeah! Oh yeah! My boys are back! Juliana and I have a great time talking about the Entourage characters that we know and love on another Hollywood adventure. We talk about what we love about each of the characters and lament over the lack of female characters, and how terrible the few are represented. 

The Entourage movie really felt like the show which is great as a viewer of the show, but other TV show movies don't accomplish that. We agree Serenity is the best example of how to end a TV show with a movie (R.I.P. Firely. Gone too soon.) and the second Sex and the City movie was unnecessary and ridiculous. We also discuss the countless movies based on old TV shows that are made in an attempt to reboot the property. (Dukes of Hazard, anyone?)

We're very excited and looking forward to our next couple of episodes. That's right, we actually have them planned already! We're getting Christmassy with the next episode about The Family Stone and ensemble casts. And then we're getting really Christmassy with another Drunk Disney episode watching I'll Be Home for Christmas starring JTT. We've never seen it before, so send us your drinking game ideas, or we're going to have to make it up as we go along!

Don't forget, we're making videos now, too! So far, we're just reviewing new movies that we see at advanced screenings or in theatres (spoiler-free) but in the new year, we'll be doing some more movie-related fun sketch/vlog kind of videos! Find In the Movies videos on my channel; here's the playlist.

Listen on iTunes, Podbean, or stay right here with the player below! Let us know what you think about this episode, suggest future episodes, or just say hi by emailing us at inthemoviespodcast@gmail.com.

My Favorite Witches

I've always felt an innate kinship to witches. I like to think it's because I was born on Halloween. I'm sure the deeper psychological reason is because witches are powerful women. I always hoped I would wake up one day with magic powers and I would finally be as unique and special and capable as I felt inside. Okay, I probably had the unique part, I was a pretty weird kid, but I was also a very shy, quiet kid. I was super smart but being so socially incapable made me feel like there was so much I couldn't do. If only I could be a witch and be able to do amazing things and control my life to go the way I wanted. Even if nobody ever knew, I would know that I had something special, that I could do something they couldn't.

Well, I didn't get a Hogwarts letter, have a family member tell me I'm a witch, or discover a book of shadows in my attic. I did watch every witch I could find in movies and TV, though. There are many witches that have shaped me, but these are my favorites.

Nancy Downs, The Craft

1. The Hair

2. She's a Leader

Obviously, Nancy Downs cannot be said to be a role model, exactly, as she is actually pretty evil, but if we take everything she does down a few notches, we can see her amazing qualities. Nancy is the clear leader of their circle with most of the ideas and knowledge. The other girls look to her for guidance and support. She befriended two other outcasts of the school and created a safe place for them to be themselves and feel powerful in a world that is constantly telling them that they are anything but. And then Nancy welcomes the new girl Sarah into her group and teaches her everything she knows. 

3. She Protects her Girls

This whole movie is about girls standing up for themselves. They fight back against bullies, boys, and abusive step-fathers. We all learn a lesson when they take everything too far, but before that we see how important female friendship is, especially for teenage girls. Nancy, as the leader, takes it upon herself to help her friends by working magic for them, warning Sarah about gross Skeet Ulrich, and she protects her mother from domestic abuse. Before all her new powers turn her completely mad, her first priority is protecting the girls/women in her life.

Gillian Owens, Practical Magic

1. The Hair

2. She's a Vagabond

Gilly leaves home at 17 and rarely comes back. She wants adventure. And she has it. She's always moving around, hanging out with new people, and having fun. I was always so envious of characters like this when I was young. I wanted to be independent and bold and social and live on the road. Turns out, that's just not my jam, but watching movies about characters like Gilly definitely is.

3. The Sister Bond

Before Gilly leaves, she makes a blood oath with her sister Sally. They are connected. When Sally's husband dies, Gilly knows she has to come home. When Gilly is in trouble, Sally knows and comes to get her. I don't have a sister, but their connection has always made me desire that sort of connection with a best friend. You're there for each other no matter what, you share your secrets and every detail of your life, and when the two of you accidentally kill your abusive boyfriend, you'll raise him from the dead. And when you have to kill that bastard again, you'll bury him the yard together. And when he starts haunting you and possesses one of you, the other will get a coven together to banish him for good. Just normal sister stuff.

Luna Lovegood, The Harry Potter Series

1. The Hair

2. She's an Outcast

Oh, Luna, my soul sister, I feel for you. People don't understand you, they make fun of you, they don't believe what you believe. You are absolutely brilliant but everyone just thinks you're a nutter. (Team Ravenclaw!)

3. She's a Goddamn Hero

Luna is a very important part of the team that ultimately defeats Voldemort and saves the wizarding world. Luna has brilliant ideas and is so brave and level-headed when shit is hitting the fan. She fights in the battles, she tells Harry about Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem, she helps them escape on the thestrals, she is kidnapped by death eaters and doesn't give up hope. She's also just a good friend to Harry, talking to him about why he can see the thestrals and helping him after Malfoy petrifies him on the train. We salute you, Luna Lovegood, hero of Hogwarts.

Sarah Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

1. The Hair

2. Witches Just Wanna Have Fun

While Winifred is busy trying to kill everyone or cast a spell on everyone, Sarah just wants to flirt with bus drivers, play with her food (children), chew on her lucky rat tail and dance with The Devil. And in a funny-throughout movie, it's her one-liners and physical comedy moments that are the funniest.

3. She Can Sing

Okay, so I'm not really on board with the Sanderson sisters' agenda, but if I were, I would say Sarah is really the key to their plot. Without Sarah, how would they get a hold of children? Sarah's beautiful voice bewitches all the children of the town making them come to them. "Come little children, I'll take you away..."

Paige Matthews, Charmed

1. The Hair

2. Her Personal Growth

Paige is thrown suddenly into the crazy world of the Charmed ones. She rejects the idea of being a freak at first, but she comes to accept her new powers, her position as a Charmed One, and her new sisters. Seeing Paige grow both as a woman and a witch is one of the strengths of the show. Paige goes from rejecting her Charmed duties to becoming Super Witch and finally finding her balance. She finds true happiness in life when she can combine the human, witch, and whitelighter parts of her into a purposeful life of helping people using all of her gifts.

3. She Has the Coolest Power(s)

Paige is half witch, half whitelighter. The prophecy says that the third sister has the power to move objects with her mind. So, after Prue, with her telekinesis, died, Paige filled her spot in the Power of Three. However, Paige's powers work differently because she's half whitelighter. Whitelighters are like guardian angels for witches, so they need to be able to quickly be at their charge's side when their life is in danger. They call it orbing, which is the magic version of teleporting. Paige can orb herself, people or things she's touching, and can also move objects that she's not touching by calling out their name as she uses her orbing power to move them. If I had to choose one witchy, or superhero, power to have, it would definitely be orbing/teleporting. I would be able to instantly be anywhere in the world! I could spend the day lounging on a beach in Fiji or hanging out in Tuscany, hiking a glacier in Greenland, looking at elephants in their natural habitat, meditating at a temple in Japan, and then pop back home to spend the night in my own bed. Imagine the possibilities!

No Sex in My City: Valley of the Twenty-Something Guys

Season 1, Episode 4: Valley of the Twenty-Something Guys

"Shouldn't we be dating men our own age?"

After Carrie and Big keep bumping into each other at social events, they finally make plans to see each other. Is it a date? Is it a thing? Who knows, because he's always bailing early or bringing along a friend. While Carrie waits for Big to decide what they're doing, she starts hanging out with twenty-something Sam. Miranda and Samantha are also dating/sleeping with twenty-something guys. Carrie gets a rush from making out with her younger man all over the place, but eventually sees his twenty-something lifestyle for what it is. (Hint: Using toilet paper as a coffee filter.) Charlotte has a dilemma when her latest picture-perfect man asks her to have anal sex. (Spoiler Alert: She declines.)

New Podcast! The Doctor's Companions: A Doctor Who Rewatch Podcast

It's another podcast from me and my friends! For this podcast, Juliana and I are joined by our friend, Linda, to discuss our favorite show Doctor Who. Well, I should say, it's definitely Juliana's and my favorite show, but Linda is our resident newbie (NeWhovian, if you will). She's watching Doctor Who for the first time for this podcast, so we can get first impressions from her as Juliana and I have rewatched the show so many times we no longer remember what our first thoughts were.

In each episode, we are discussing two episodes of Doctor Who, starting at the beginning of the new series with "Rose". Linda gives her first impressions of characters and plot lines, while Juliana and I can be a bit more critical of how the show compares to its future episodes. This podcast definitely has spoilers as Juliana and I are always getting ahead of ourselves, comparing The Doctor, baddies, and companions to future storylines. However, as Linda is still working her way through the entire series, we try not to spoil ahead of what Linda has seen. In a few months, when Linda is caught up- all bets are off, we can talk about anything! So this isn't a podcast for people to listen to along with their first viewing of the series. It's for crazy Whovians who are so into Doctor Who that they would want to listen to three friends discuss each and every episode.

Aside from discussing what happens in each episode, our thoughts, and comparisons to the rest of the series, we will be pointing out sneaky foreshadowing (like every "bad wolf" reference), deciding how realistic the science is (Where is this artificial gravity coming from?!), and fun behind-the-scenes tidbits we get from Doctor Who Confidential. We also do fun stuff like tell you which British treat we are indulging in while we record (tea, of course, but also Jammie Dodgers, etc.), answer any emails we get from listeners, a question of the week (Who's your favorite one-off companion?), and we always check in to see if anyone cried during that episode. (Season 2 finale, for sure!)

We recorded the first three episodes in one crazy long afternoon full of comparing notes, feeling awkward talking into a mic, tea, Jammie Dodgers, and sore butts from sitting on shitty folding chairs. Unfortunately, I recorded those first three episodes with some kind of voice effect on, so we all have a bit of an echo. Fortunately, I realized what the problem was, and the audio will be much cleaner after the third episode.

This podcast will have the same uneven schedule (two weeks on, one week off) as In the Movies, so it will take approximately one hundred years to get through the entire series, but we are all looking forward to it!

Listen to it on iTunes (subscribe, rate & review!), our Podbean site, or right here, using the embedded player below!

Buffy Virgin: Season 2, Part 2

It's been taking me a long time between these posts because I haven't loved watching Buffy. Not so much that it's not a good show, it's more the detailed analysis I have to do as I watch instead of just watching it for fun. I think the next post will have a different style, focusing more on my thoughts on the episode than what happened in the episode. I mean, you guys know what happened, I'm the Buffy virgin here. By the end of this season, though, I'm getting really into it and looking forward to next season!

Ep. 12: Bad Eggs

While Buffy is at the mall trying to convince her mom to let her buy an outfit that makes her look like a “streetwalker”, she spots a cowboy vampire and beats him up but he gets away. In this episode, Buffy is learning about responsibility. She gets grounded more than once for being irresponsible. The whole class is learning about responsibility, actually. They’re doing the classic egg baby project in health class. As if carrying around a chicken egg making sure it doesn’t break is anything like having to care for a human infant. Although, these eggs actually contain weird little mind-controlling demons, so maybe they’re not so different.

Willow's reaction compared to Buffy's reaction.

Buffy kills hers, but just about everyone else gets one attached to them, making them slaves to the big mama demon thing in the school basement. Buffy and Xander save the day, kill the big blobby demon, scare away the cowboy, but Buffy still gets grounded.

I’m Confused: When asked what she thinks about, Buffy straight-up tells her mom “Saving the world from vampires.” And her mom just brushes it off. But her mom was there when Spike and a bunch of vamps were running around the school and she even beat up Spike to save Buffy. Was there some kind of memory wipe after that I missed? What did she think that was?

New Characters: Cowboy vampire brothers

Favorite Quote: “I can’t do this. I can’t take care of things. I killed my Giga Pet. Literally, I sat on it and it broke.” Maybe Buffy should have tried a Tamagotchi or a Nano Pet instead.

Mythology Lesson: The cowboy vampire brothers were bad guys even before they were vampires back in the wild west. They also seem to know, or know of, Angel(us).

Demon Deaths: One cowboy vampire brother, big blobby demon

Human Deaths: Zero. Good job, Buffy.

Ep. 13: Surprise

Big episode. All the things. Much drama.

Drusilla is back! Remember when they thought they killed Spike & Drusilla just because they were buried under a collapsed church? I guess after killing so many inferior vampires and demons, you don’t think of double-checking that they’re definitely dead. Well, Drusilla is back in full force but poor Spike has some scars and rolls around in a wheelchair while Drusilla plans a party.

Love is in the air. Buffy and Angel make-out and in a weird indirect way maybe decide to have sex sometime? Willow and Oz ask each other out in an adorable way. Xander tries to convince Cordelia to be a real couple but she’s still too embarrassed by him.

So, Jenny Calendar is not a techno pagan? But she is a gypsy whose family put the curse on Angel so he would suffer for all of eternity as vengeance for killing Drusilla. (I’m putting that together from what I remember of Angel’s & Drusilla’s history. He didn’t actually say her name...) Jenny’s uncle insists that Jenny get rid of Buffy because she is making Angel’s life less horrible than it should be.

The gang throws Buffy a surprise party but the surprise is vampires with a box and the box contains an arm. Angel and Giles figure out it must be that Drusilla is bringing together the pieces of The Judge, a demon that will bring on Armageddon. Why is he in pieces? Because he can’t be killed, so last time they just dismembered him and spread out the pieces. Angel volunteers to get the arm as far away as possible, which upsets Buffy very much as it would mean he would be gone for months. He gives Buffy a Claddagh ring for her birthday. I wonder if this is why those rings became so popular?

But Angel can’t leave because they’re interrupted by vampires who get their arm back, and they put all the pieces together to create The Judge. Buffy and Angel have a close call when spying on the vamp party, meeting The Judge, but make it back to Angel’s place where they confess their love and do the do. Not on screen, but I’m assuming that’s why one second they’re making out and the next, they’re sleeping in his bed. But Angel jumps up like he’s in pain and suddenly he’s fully clothed outside in the rain and we get a “to be continued”, so let’s continue and find out if that was actually just another one of Buffy’s prophetic dreams.

New Characters: Jenny Calendar’s uncle, The Judge

Favorite Quote: Willow explains their ‘Round Robin’ concept. Buffy: “Thus freeing us up for world save-age.” Willow: “And all night keggers! What, only Xander gets to make dumb jokes?"

Mythology Lesson: Jenny Calendar is actually a gypsy sent to Sunnydale to make sure Angel is still cursed.

The Judge is a demon that will rid the world of humanity, bring on Armageddon, etc. He can’t be killed, but he was dismembered.

Angel said the claddagh ring is from his people, so I guess Angel is Irish?

Demon Deaths: A few vamps

Human Deaths: No one yet

Ep. 14: Innocence

Okay, it wasn’t a dream. Angel is actually in pain, but then suddenly isn’t because he’s in full-on vampire mode. Soulless Angel goes to hang out with Spike & Drusilla because they can all be friends now.

Jenny’s uncle tells her that Angel’s curse has been lifted because the soul they cursed him with experienced true happiness (aka banging Buffy).

While Willow is all freaked out about catching Xander and Cordelia making out, Angel shows up to reveal his new/old self to everyone. Jenny the Gypsy also reveals her part in all this. Buffy is very upset the whole time because she finally gave it up to her boyfriend and now he’s evil and mean to her and trying to kill her friends and all of humanity. Teenage drama, huh.

The vamps decide the mall is the best place for The Judge to begin Armageddon, so Buffy shows up with a bazooka to blast apart The Judge.

New Characters: No one new.

Favorite Quote: “Does looking at guns make you wanna have sex?” “I’m 17. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex.” -Cordelia & Xander

Mythology Lesson: Angel’s curse is lifted when his soul experiences true happiness, which apparently was doing it with Buffy.

Demon Deaths: The Judge

Human Deaths: The Judge zaps a few people at the mall

Ep. 15: Phases

This big stupid jock guy is talking to Oz about gettin’ some Buffy and Willow action, asking Oz how far he’s gotten with Willow. High school boys are so gross! He’s so gross, he knocks a girl’s books out of her hands so he can watch her pick them up and grabs Buffy’s ass during a self defence class. We’re also led to believe he might be the werewolf that attacked Cordelia & Xander. Another misogynist creep is this guy hunting werewolves. He laughs at Buffy when she says she’s hunting werewolves because “you’re a girl” and continues to say stupid sexist comments to Buffy while they try to find the werewolf.

Xander confronts the big stupid jock about being the werewolf in a hilarious way that neither says what they’re actually talking about, which leads to the jock confessing that he’s gay. Typical over-compensating closet homosexual. Well, if dumb jock isn’t the werewolf who is? It’s cute little Oz! But they manage to find him and catch him before the hunter can kill him. And then he and Willow finally kiss!

New Characters: Jock dude. (Played by “Ice” from Hocus Pocus. Hehehe.)

Favorite Quote: “Let’s not jump to any conclusions.” “I didn’t jump. I took a tiny step and there conclusions were.” - Giles and Buffy

Mythology Lesson: The nights before and after a full moon count as a full moon when it comes to mythical magical stuff like werewolves.

Demon Deaths: Angel turns a girl from school into a vamp and Xander stakes her

Human Deaths: I guess that can also count as a human death.

Ep. 16: Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered

It’s Valentine’s Day soon and love is in the air. Or, not. Xander wants to give Cordelia a necklace for the big day but Cordelia breaks up with him because her friends tease her. Xander is so upset that he blackmails Amy to work a love spell for him after he catches her using magic to hand in imaginary homework.

Giles, however, is less worried about teen romance and more concerned about what Angel will do for Valentine’s Day as he has a history of Valentine’s Day massacres. Angel sends Buffy roses with the ominous note “Soon". Angel is also busy showing Drusilla some love with a lovely human heart, which seems to beat out Spike’s gift of a necklace.

Xander and Amy’s love spell backfires. Instead of making Cordelia want him, the spell makes every other female obsessed with him. Buffy comes onto him, so Amy gets jealous and turns her into a rat. While Oz runs around the school trying to find Rat Buffy, Xander and Cordelia run away from the hoards of girls that want to kill either Cordelia because she didn’t appreciate him, or Xander because if they can’t have him, no one can.

Of course, Giles and Amy get the undo spell to work just in time and everyone (except our gang) forgets what happened. We end on a happy note when Cordelia stands up to her friends and tells them she’s going to date Xander and the two walk off together. Aww!

New Characters: Amy is back.

Favorite Quote: “I seem to be having a slight case of nudity here.” I think being completely naked is more than a slight case, Buffy.

Mythology Lesson: Amy’s mom was a witch who switched bodies with her to relive her cheerleading days. And also kill some teenage girls. (Season 1, Episode 3)

Demon Deaths: Only 1 vamp that Buffy gets on her regular patrol.

Human Deaths: Fortunately none of the love-sick girls manage to kill each other or Xander in their rage.

Ep. 17: Passion

Angel narrates over this episode a lot, talking about “passion” and super creepy things. He creeps out Buffy, and her loved ones, with notes and drawings. Talented artist that he is (he’s had a lot of time to practice), his work is not appreciated.

Jenny is trying to make up for what her family’s curse did to Angel. (He was cursed with a soul, but lost it when he banged Buffy.) She gets her hand on a crystal ball thing that can capture a soul, she just needs to translate some text in order to use it. As her computer finishes the translation, Angel shows up to show her how much he doesn’t want his soul back. He smashes the orb and, lacking a full grasp of technology, smashes the computer and burns the printed copy on the computer fire. (Because on TV, anything electronic will start a roaring fire if smashed.) Angel chases her down as she tries to escape and snaps her neck. Little does he know that Jenny invoked the golden rule: Back up your work. The translation is saved on a technological marvel known in the 1900’s as a “floppy disk”.

Angel, being the sick fuck that he is, stages a romantic evening at Giles’ home complete with roses, champagne, music, and Jenny’s dead body. Giles seeks revenge, but, thankfully, Buffy figures out his plan and swoops in to save the day. We’re all sad about Jenny’s death and her lost plans, until Willow unknowingly knocks the floppy disk between the desk & filing cabinet and we all get excited that there’s still hope for Angel. If only anyone ever cleaned between furniture like that...

New Characters: None

Favorite Quote: “The ‘Na na na na na na!’ approach to battle.” “Yes, Xander. Once more, you’ve managed to boil a complex thought down to its simplest possible form.” - Xander & Giles

Also, honourable mention for Xander’s use of the movie title Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Mythology Lesson: The Orb of Thesulah can capture a soul and hold onto it until you’re ready. Jenny needs to translate an ancient text before she can use it, though.

Demon Deaths: None

Human Deaths: Ms. Jenny Calendar, the Techno-Pagan.

Thoughts So Far:

How much longer is Angel going to be evil? As much fun as it is to see the new relationship dynamic between Spike, Drusilla, and Angel, I like it better when Angel is kind of playing for both sides. Buffy & the gang get the help of a really old vampire and Buffy gets her weird relationship problems. I was not sorry to see Jenny go. I got bored of her character right away. Sorry, Giles, only the teenagers get to be in love. I guess I’m still watching, waiting for something more exciting to happen than just the demon-of-the-week...

Ep. 18: Killed by Death

Buffy has the flu and Cordelia's main concern is that Buffy looks gross. While fighting Angel, Buffy passes out and wakes up in the hospital. Cordelia makes some comment about how Buffy should get that thing on her face fixed while she's in the hospital. What thing on her face?!

Buffy has fever dreams of a Freddy Kruger kind of guy walking to the kids' ward of the hospital and the kids say "death" comes for them at night. Buffy is already creeped out by hospitals because when she was 8, she witnessed her cousin dying in a hospital. Cordelia makes the surprisingly intelligent observation that Buffy might be making up this demon in an attempt to create a defeatable opponent because she can't fight disease & death.

Once the kids' doctor suffers the same fate as the kids, removing him from the suspect list, Buffy gets the idea to infect herself with the fever again so she's able to see the demon so she can fight it. It works and she kills it with violence, as usual.

New Characters: Kids in the hospital

Favorite Quote: "Flowers for m'lady." "I think they call those balloons." "Ya, stick 'em in water maybe they'll grow." Good one, Xander.

Mythology Lesson: Der Kindestod- means "child death". He feeds off children by sucking the life out of them, leaving them looking like they died of their illness. He does this by sitting on them. (Babysitter joke, anyone?)

Demon Deaths: Der Kindestod

Human Deaths: A few kids, the kids' doctor

Ep. 19: I Only Have Eyes for You

The Sadie Hawkins dance is coming up- don't even get me started on the gender stereotyping rant that I went on to myself watching this episode. In honour of the upcoming Sadie Hawkins dance, I guess, a tortured spirit is haunting the school. In a sort of poltergeist-time loop mash-up, people are getting temporarily possessed and reenacting a scene between lovers. It seems to be a forbidden romance and she is leaving him, so he shoots her. Well, it doesn't get that far because Buffy interrupts some teens who don't remember acting out the scene, and the gun disappeared. That troll of a principal is back and out to get Buffy, trying to blame her for the incident. The poltergeist activity also includes Buffy seeing scenes of the student-teacher relationship that is causing the haunting, and a teacher writing out  DON'T WALK AWAY FROM ME BITCH! on the blackboard. Doing some research, they find out about the past relationship and how it ended. They suspect the boy's spirit is holding on, seeking forgiveness.

Meanwhile, Angel is full of wheelchair puns for Spike and I love it. Turns out Spike is faking his paralysis, though! I'm really enjoying this Angel-Drusilla-Spike love triangle. 

Willow is teaching Ms. Calendar's class (What?! Students can just teach classes now?!) and going through her research and spells. Is this the beginning of Willow becoming a witch?

They try to exorcise the school with a spell and it kind of works, but I guess not because Buffy goes back in and so does Angel and they both get caught in the love scene, except Angel in the woman's place and when he gets shot, he doesn't die, so they continue being possessed and are able to act out a nice ending for the spirits, who go into the light or whatever.

I'm Confused: The principal and the police chief have a conversation about what to say to hide this weird activity, like we've seen them do before, but this time they actually mention being on the Hellmouth and bring the mayor into it. So, the important town officials know about all this? How much do they know? Do they know that Buffy is the Slayer? You'd think the principal would cut Buffy a break if he knew how important it is for her to be able to miss school and do this crazy stuff, but maybe he doesn't like her because he knows about this demon stuff but is on their side? I'm intrigued to say the least...

New Characters: The spirits acting out their love affair.

Favorite Quote: "Something weird is going on." "Isn't that our school motto?"

Mythology Lesson: A student and teacher had an affair back in the 50's. When she ended it, he shot her and then himself.

Demon Deaths: None

Human Deaths: The possessed janitor shoots a teacher.

Ep. 20: Go Fish

I hate just about every male in this episode. And the American school system. The swim team boys finally won semi-finals so they're getting special treatment in classes and generally being misogynistic asshats. It makes me sad to hear Cordelia even reenforcing this shit saying Xander runs "like a girl" and "some people deserve special treatment". Ugh.

Buffy is having none of your victim-blaming bullshit.

One of the swim team boys takes a shining to Buffy, and forces himself on her in his car, so she rightfully smashes his head against his steering wheel. The principal and this kid are just the worst people ever saying all that victim blaming shit like "You were leading me on." "Well, look how you dress." etc. Ugh.

Well, the stupid swim team gets what they deserve (sorry, a little harsh) because they're being killed off, only their skin remaining. Xander goes undercover to find out what's going on. Turns out the coach is putting what they all think is steroids in their steam room. It's actually some weird science experiment that is making them all good swimmers because they're actually turning into fishy creatures, that climb out of their own skin.

The coach is the real bad guy here, and he gets attacked by his monsters and then they escape to the sea. Be free, fishies, be free!

New Characters: Shane West and Wentworth Miller play guys from the swim team! 90's heartthrobs! 

Favorite Quote: "It's one thing to be dating the lame unpopular guy but it's another to be dating a creature from the blue lagoon." "Black lagoon. The creature from the Blue Lagoon was Brooke Shields."

Mythology Lesson: Coach says something about the fish stuff being leftover after the fall of the Soviet Union, an experiment to make soldiers better swimmers.

Demon Deaths: None? I don't think they killed any of the fish guys...

Human Deaths: Swim coach

Ep. 21: Becoming: Part 1

We get to see first hand Angel's origin story. Both becoming a vampire and becoming a vampire with a soul. And how he came to Sunnydale and started falling for Buffy. David Boreanaz's Irish accent isn't quite up to snuff. It doesn't explain why he came to New York after being cursed with a soul, or why he adapted an American accent.

Like, OMG, Buffy, you're like totally a vampire slayer! As if!

Angel is hellbent on bringing hell to Earth. Another big scary mythical creature/demon is unearthed and Angel wants to use it to bring on the apocalypse (This show needs some new big plot ideas besides ancient demons who can bring on an apocalypse.) While Buffy and Willow are trying to find a way to stop him, they finally find that floppy disk with Ms. Calendar's translation of the thing that can bring Angel's soul back!

While Buffy confronts Angel, Drusilla and some vamps attack the gang in the library while they're trying to do the spell. They steal Giles hoping that he will help them activate this evil thing. Buffy is found over the body of Kendra (Oh, yeah, the other Slayer showed up) and runs from the police.

I'm Confused: We see some of Buffy's origin story in this episode as well. Is this stuff from the movie? Is that man her Watcher who showed up to tell her she's the Slayer? Should I have watched the movie?

New Characters: Mysterious guy who brings Angel to Sunnydale (Rune from Gilmore Girls!)

Favorite Quote: "I wish for once you would support me! And I realize right now that you were and I'm embarrassed, so I'm gonna get back to the point." Oh. Xander.

Mythology Lesson: We get to see some of Angel's origin story.

Demon Deaths: None?

Human Deaths: None?

Ep. 22: Becoming: Part 2

Spike catches up with Buffy on the run wanting to strike a deal. He just wants to get himself and Drusilla out of the country, Buffy can have her Angel back. Buffy takes Spike home to talk where they run into her mom and the secret is spilled. Her mom overreacts and tells Buffy if she leaves (to go save the world) she can't come back. Harsh, mom. She's the Slayer, okay? She can't help it.

Buffy's mom and Spike share an awkward moment.

Willow is able to do the spell again and Angel gets his soul back right has he and Buffy are about to kill each other. They share a kiss and then she stabs him to close the portal to hell.

I'm left with many questions: Why hasn't Buffy's mom remembered anything until now? She says she does remember hitting Spike that time.

Where is Buffy going on the bus? Is she homeless? On the run from the police? Going to visit her dad for the summer again?

Where did Spike and Drusilla go?

Does Angel find a way back from hell? Does he turn up somewhere else and that's why he gets his own show?

Since Buffy's death (that she came back from) triggered the new Slayer, Kendra, while Kendra's death trigger the next Slayer? Is that Faith?

New Characters: That mysterious guy from Angel's past again

Favorite Quote: "Have we met?" "You hit me with an axe, one time. Remember? 'Get the hell away from my daughter.'" "Oh." Buffy's mom + Spike. I ship it.

Mythology Lesson: Angel opened the portal to hell, so only he can close it.

Demon Deaths: Some vamps. Angel?

Human Deaths: Kendra, the other Slayer

Thoughts on Season 2

I'm finally really interested in this show! So much as been revealed that I want to know more about. I want to know what the principal and the mayor really know about the Hellmouth and Buffy. I want to know more about Angel coming to America. I want to know if Willow is a witch now. I want to know if Faith is going to show up now. I want to know if Angel is going to come back. I want to know where Spike & Drusilla went, and when Spike is coming back because I know he does. I. Am. Interested. 

No Sex in My City: Bay of Married Pigs

Season 1, Episode 3: Bay of Married Pigs 
 

“Married people are the enemy."

The women discuss the idea of marrieds vs. singles after Carrie gets kicked out of her friend’s beach house because she saw her friend’s husband sans undies. Charlotte wants to stick up for married people because she so desperately wants to be one, while Miranda is in full-on anti-marrieds rant mode. Carrie just feels left out but hates the looks of pity she gets from marrieds, and Samantha thinks it’s not pity, but fear of single women stealing their husbands that creates the animosity.

Miranda gets set up with a woman because her co-worker assumed she was gay just because he’s never seen her with a man. (Has he ever seen her with a woman? I never understood the single=gay logic men impose on women.) She decides to try it out for a while to be accepted at work as a couple, further confirming her hypothesis that married people just want single people “figured out”.

Carrie gets set up with a man she dubs “the marrying guy”, she takes him for a test drive to see if she might be the marrying kind after all, but ultimately has to be honest with him that that’s not the life she’s looking for.

Samantha gets set up for a horrible night at a party full of couples, so she gets very drunk and sleeps with Charlotte’s Irish doorman.

And Charlotte gets set up with Carrie’s sloppy seconds, since they’re both the “marrying kind”. Their china pattern choices clash, however.

Favorite Outfit

You don’t see much of it, but I am loving the buttoned up suit style on Miranda. I think she’s doing it to try to look more gay, but I’m really into women in beautiful fitted suits.

Character I Most Identify With: Carrie

Carrie’s not sure she’s even “the marrying kind” and neither am I. I’m not like Charlotte, treating marriage like a sorority she’s desperate to pledge, or Samantha who would laugh at the suggestion that she ever commit to one man. I’m somewhere in between. Not actively searching for someone to partner up with, but open to the possibility of a long-term, even life-time, relationship.

“She said I couldn’t understand it- I’m single."

There is a lot of marrieds behavior in this episode that drives me nuts and that quote is one of them. Married people treating single people like they can't understand relationship dynamics, love, basic human emotions, just because they haven't permanently attached themselves to someone is absurd. One of the women in the interviews part of the episode says something about how she chose to grow up and get married while other people choose a life of stunted adolescence and sadness. I feel bad for that woman if that's what she thinks life boils down to- marriage is maturity and singledom is immaturity. Marriage is a choice, sure, but meeting the right person for you is not. It's happenstance and luck and the universe putting you in the right place at the right time. That's why I never understand people who think they have their life planned out, including marriage, because you can't plan when you're going to meet the right person. You can get married just because you decide it's time to get married and just go with whoever you're with at the moment just because he's there to marry.

I would guess that any married person who looks down on single people probably isn't very happy in their marriage. When you're not happy, you take it out on other people. It's basic bullying dynamic. Your life sucks, so you have to make someone else feel like their life sucks so you are justified in your life choices.

I'm probably being very cynical about all this (spinster cliché!) but I will never be okay with anyone making anyone else feel bad about their life choices just because they're different. I will never let anyone make me feel bad for being single or not wanting kids because I am a complete and happy person even without a relationship and the kids thing is a choice, so don't fight me on that.

Buffy Virgin: Season 2, Part 1

Finally, we continue our adventures in Sunnydale! Now with screenshots, so you can feel like you were there watching it with me. (Don't you wish?)

Ep. 1: When She Was Bad

Awwwwww! Xander and Willow are so cute! They have a moment and almost kiss but then a vampire shows up. And so does Buffy.

"Miss me?” (They did.)

Buffy seems concerned with The Master being buried. Or maybe she just doesn't want to talk vampires. She seems uninterested but then she/SMG's body double goes full force into her training. PTSD? So, killing The Master and closing the Hellmouth didn't rid Sunnydale of vampires. There seems to be one piece they missed in the season one finale: The Anointed One. That damn kid is still around, apparently leading vampires. Angel is back. Pulling an Edward Cullen again. Warns Buffy of The Anointed One. Buffy's been acting weird since she got back but it is particularly weird when she blows off Angel to dance with Xander to the weird Japanese band at The Bronze. Even Cordelia calls her out on her 'tude right before being abducted by vamps. Ruh roh. Now the secrets out: The Master has been dug up. Bitch Buffy wants to take care of it all by herself. But she can't because it's a trap! She works through her issues by killing a bunch of vamps and smashing The Master’s bones. But, damnit, the annoying Anointed kid is still around! They always forget to tie up that lose end!

New Characters: It's just all our old favorites! Although they all have new hair-do's!

Favorite Quote: “You're the watcher. I just work here.”-Buffy

Mythology Lesson: The Master can be brought back with a ritual involving the blood of those who were nearest him when he died.

Demon Death Count: About 5 vamps

Human Death Count: Buffy saves the day! No deaths.

Ep. 2: Some Assembly Required

Buffy is waiting for Stefan to wake up in the cemetery (who's Stefan?) and Angel shows up and they get in a cute jealous couple fight. Buffy falls in an open grave while chasing after Angel which is hilarious.

And this begins our mystery of the episode: a girl was dragged from her grave? Pervy yearbook camera nerd & his science nerd friend say something creepy about too bad Cordelia is alive. So, obviously they are the creeps we are looking for. The crew heads to the graveyard to see if any other of the recently deceased cheerleaders have been dug up while Angel finds Cordelia hiding in a dumpster where she finds some body parts. Cordelia hangs onto Angel like a sad puppy dog which Angel revels in as Buffy gets a taste of her own jealous medicine. They figure out that the creeps are indeed the creeps they are looking for but they don't show up for school because they are busy working on their patchwork girl who still needs a head. Why? Oh, because his dead brother is not dead but in fact a zombie who wants a lady-friend. 

 Commence the hunt and the fight. Buffy wins. All is well.

New Characters: Chris, the science nerd. Pervy camera guy.

Favorite Quote: “She's a techno-pagan, right? Ask her to bless your laptop." (This techno-pagan stuff cracks me up!)

Mythology Lesson: You can stitch body parts together and reanimate dead flesh, apparently.

Demon Death Count: Vamps: 1

Human Death Count: Darryl, but he was already kind of dead

Ep. 3: School Hard

Buffy and the other worst student at Sunnydale are given the task of organizing the parent-teacher night together. Xander jinxes it by saying maybe nothing bad will happen and then Spike drives into town! He joins the vamps & the Anointed One chatting about killing the Slayer. And then Drusilla shows up! She acts all spacey and weird which I find confusing because I thought she was a vamp, too. What is she...? Oh, she's psychic? Anyway, Buffy is having trouble balancing school and slaying, made even more difficult by Spike testing her skills as he prepares to kill her on Saturday, which is night of Saint Vigeous, a night that vampires do a lot of killing or something. If we weren't sure spacey Drusilla was actually a vampire, we are now as she feeds on bad ass Sheila. Shit hits the fan when Spike and his gang crash parent-teacher night. But who comes to Buffy's rescue as Spike is about to do her in? Buffy's mom!

(I just noticed Spike's nail polish. I love him.)

The principal and police officer agree to use the usual excuse of gang members on PCP, which makes me think they know the truth... Spike kills the Anointed One, so I guess Spike is leader of the Sunnydale vamps now.

New Characters: Spike! Drucilla! Worst student Sheila.

Favorite Quote: “Now, any of you wanna test who's got the biggest wrinkles around here, step on up." -Spike

Mythology Lesson: Night of St. Vigeous. Vampire crusades, killing etc. Spike's got history: William the bloody. Earned his nickname by torturing his victims with railroad spikes. He's killed two slayers in the last century. He and Angel have a history; Angel is Spike's "sire". (Or Spike is Angel's? Spike made Angel, I think.)

Demon Death Count: Buffy defeats most of Spike’s gang. Spike kills a few himself and the Anointed One, finally.

Human Death Count: Only two, according to the police.

Ep. 4: Inca Mummy Girl

Another international historically mystical mystery begins on a class field trip, this time at a museum where the kids are learning about Inca human sacrifice. There's a dumb kid who tries to steal some mystical curse plate from a mummy but he breaks it and she chokes him. When the crew go to look for him, they find that he has replaced the petrified mummy. Buffy is late picking up her foreign exchange student and he gets the life sucked out of him by the mummy. Damn, your tardiness, Buffy! The mummy becomes a real life girl thanks to his life force. She pretends to be the foreign exchange student so she can get her life back.

OMG it's Seth Green! He has facial hair! He's in a band! Their van has black & white stripes!

The mummy has a bodyguard, apparently. He wants the seal (broken plate) back to put the mummy back. But the mummy girl isn't having that. She sucks his life, too. Xander and mummy girl are adorably in puppy love at the dance while Willow looks adorable in her Eskimo costume and gets noticed by little Seth Green up on stage.

Mummy girl starts turning back into a mummy so she picks an unsuspecting boy to feed on- it's Doyle! (Gilmore Girls) but he gets away. Good, I can't wait for more 'Doyle: The Teenage Years'.

So, the mummy girl runs out of life before she can feed again and crumples up again, even though the seal wasn't fixed. And the gang just leaves this big ol mummy mess at the museum. Which, by the way, how did they get in after hours?! Where is museum security?! Goddamnit, Sunnydale. Get your shit together.

New Characters: Rodney, the dumb kid. Seth Green! I mean, "Oz". Mummy girl. Doyle! (I don't know his characters name.)

Favorite Quote: “Maybe he went out for a smoke.” "For 21 hours?" "It's addictive, you know." -Willow and Xander

Mythology Lesson: Inca human sacrifice was a thing.

Demon Death Count: Mummy girl goes back to being a mummy.

Human Death Count: Mummified: 3

Thoughts So Far

This show is really funny. There are so many good one-liners amidst the demon-fighting chaos. I'm getting pretty tired of every episode following the same formula, though. Something mysterious happens, the team gets some of the clues, the rest is revealed to the viewer, the team catches up just in time to save the day. With no consequences or mention of these horrific occurences ever again. I was excited to see some more characters I actually remember; Spike, Drusilla, Seth Green "Oz".

Ep. 5: Reptile Boy

The episode begins with Buffy, Xander, and Willow trying to understand what is going on in a Bollywood movie, which sounds like a great way to spend an evening. Meanwhile, a girl is running away from some dudes in monk-like robes. I'm guessing they aren't monks, though, because the one dude is a 90's teen hunk. Oh, that's because they're frat boys! Gross. Cordelia is dating one and another one chats up Buffy and she totally falls for it which is weird because he is not even hot, especially compared to Angel. Angel, who shows up at the cemetery when Buffy finds a clue. They have a very emotional, tortured conversation about how they can't date because he's 241 and he can't control himself. Yes, it's all very Twilight. Poor Angel. Poor Buffy. So, Buffy agrees to go to the frat party with Cordelia where she dances with frat boy Tom and gets roofied.

(Don't drink drinks that strangers give to you!)

Buffy, Cordelia, and the other missing girl are now chained up in the basement as the frat summons up their demon snake that they worship, but of course Buffy breaks free and kills it just as the rest of the gang gets there.

New Characters: Creepy frat boys.

Favorite Quote: “The reflection thing. You don't have. Angel, how do you shave?" Good question, Willow.

Mythology Lesson: The frat boys are worshipping some thing called Makita who looks like a Silurian/basilisk/Voldemort mix.

Demon Death Count: Makita gets chopped.

Human Death Count: None!

Ep. 6: Halloween

We start with a Buffy vs. vamp fight as usual, but this time she's being watched. A vampire is recording her with a video camera. I, for one, am impressed that someone that old managed to figure out the new technology. While Spike reviews the footage, Buffy is obsessing over Angel (big change there). She and Willow steal the Watcher diaries to find out more about him and Buffy is jealous of the old fashioned ladies in big dresses because she's feeling not-pretty-enough. The creepy costume shop guy just gives her a pretty old fashioned dress and then worships some chaos god which turns everyone into their Halloween costumes.

Kids are demons, Willow is a ghost, Xander is a soldier, and Buffy is an innocent young lady from 1775. Spike enjoys the chaos, hunting for the now-helpless Slayer. Xander enjoys being the big strong man protecting Buffy instead of the other way around.

Giles seems to have a history with the costume shop owner. Apparently a badass history for Giles, he keeps calling Giles “Ripper". Giles beats up shop owner until he tells him how to stop the chaos and Buffy turns back into her Slayer self just in time to fight off Spike. And we end with Buffy & Angel working out their issues and Giles being left an ominous note from his old pal Ethan.

New Characters: Jerk who bullies Xander, Ethan Rayne the costume shop owner.

Favorite Quote: "Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see." "Eyeballs to entrails my sweet.” Drusilla + Spike = Love
Mythology Lesson: Yonos, the two-faced god.
Demon Death Count: Vamps: 1
Human Death Count: None that we see, but there was a lot of bad guys running around...


Ep. 7: Lie to Me
Buffy sees Angel and Drusilla getting close in the park: commence insecure jealousy. Do Angel and Drusilla have more of a history than we know about? They were getting very personal. Buffy cheers up when her old friend, Ford, moves to town. He surprises Buffy with his knowledge that she is the Slayer. She thinks it's nice not to have secrets but he's up to something with a bunch of other kids who want to become vampires.

Angel, Willow, & Xander check out the wannabe-vamp club while Buffy encounters some vamps with Ford. Instead of killing the vamp like he told Buffy he did, he asked her for information and set her free. When Buffy brings in Giles for help, she identifies Drusilla from a photo and the thought-slayed vampire as it steals a book from the library. So, Ford makes a deal with Spike: the Slayer in exchange for turning him into a vamp. Buffy's onto him but he has a sad story about brain tumors to try to justify his choice. The stupid vamp-wannabes get free because Buffy uses Drusilla as leverage with Spike. Ford gets what he wants only to be staked by Buffy when he pops up out of his grave.

New Characters: Buffy's old friend, Ford.
Favorite Quote: “Oh, that's what that song is about!” -Willow about "I Touch Myself"
Mythology Lesson: In Angel's early vampire days, he was obsessed with a chaste Drusilla. He drove her mad by killing everyone she knew until she fled to a convent where Angel finally made her a vampire.
Demon Death Count: One vamp
Human Death Count: Ford


Ep. 8: The Dark Age
A man in a suit is desperate to find Giles, and escape a zombie named Deidre, but Buffy is in the library at night with Giles aerobicizing to loud music. I question the school board policies that allow a student to exercise in the library with a faculty member late at night while Deidre gets to the suit guy, kills him, and then turns to goo. The gang discuss how Giles is such an old fuddy-duddy but then he’s all adorable with the techno-pagan and they kiss. Giles and Jenny sitting in a tree...

Giles has to identify the body of the suit man, who turns out to be an old friend from jolly old England sporting an interesting tattoo, which we later see Giles sporting as well. He crosses Deidre off a list of names after he finds out she died. The only names left are Ethan Rayne (the costume shop guy who called Giles “Ripper”) and Giles himself. Damn, Giles, you’re finally getting interesting.
School on a Saturday is proven to be a bad idea when Buffy finds Ethan in the library and dead guy comes to get Ethan. Dead guy turns to goo before he can get Ethan, but when the goo touches Jenny (the techno-pagan) (still funny) she appears to contract the evilness. Evil Jenny goes after Giles, but Buffy steps in and Giles tells her his deep dark secret past of dropping out of Oxford, practicing magic, and summoning a demon. Buffy goes to find Ethan and falls for the stupid “No, you first.” trick and gets whacked on the back of the head and tied up for Ethan’s ritual.

Buffy gets the mark of Eyghon tattooed on her so it goes after her instead of Ethan but the kids bust in with Angel and a plan- the demon will go into Angel because he’s dead but the demon inside Angel fights back and wins. Ethan escapes, though, so I bet we haven’t seen the last of him.

New Characters: Giles’ dead friends
Favorite Quote: “Have I ever let you down?” “Should I answer that or just glare?” -Buffy and Giles
Mythology Lesson: Giles and his friends have the mark of Eyghon, a demon who gave Giles and his friend a good high when invoked.
Demon Death Count: A few vamps trying to steal blood from the hospital
Human Death Count: Giles’ friends


Thoughts So Far
Now that Spike and Drusilla have been introduced, and we know they have a past with Angel, I want more of that storyline! I’m so over the demon-of-the-week routine. Let’s dive into a Spike-Drusilla-Angel tortured love/hate triangle, with Buffy thrown in there for some Twilight-level tortured romance. Speaking of romance, where did Seth Green aka Oz go? Let’s give the crew their own lives outside of being Buffy’s research monkeys, please.


Ep. 9: What’s My Line? Part 1
The kids are taking a career test but Buffy is bitter because she already knows what she's going to be when she grows up; The Slayer. I beg to differ since being the Slayer doesn't pay the rent. She has to go to high school while being the Slayer so I think she'll still need a job.
Spike and Drusilla are back! Spike is trying to find Drusilla's cure in a book but it's in code and they must find the key.

Buffy and Angel are being all adorable which is weird because I haven't even seen them together lately, let alone cutesy coupley. Speaking of cute couples, Oz is back! He and Willow were selected by some software company big wig to be recruited at the career fair.
Buffy and Giles are onto the plan to decode this book which will unleash unspeakable evil, etc. while Spike's hired bounty hunters find their way to Sunnydale as well as a girl looking like she belongs in a TLC music video.

Buffy and Angel have their skate date but I'm not impressed. By Buffy's skating, I mean. Sorry, girl but I used to be a figure skater and you ain't got shit. But they kill an assassin and then she kisses his vamp face while TLC girl watches. And then she tries to kill Angel and speaks in a bad fake Caribbean kind of accent.
We're left with a cliffhanger of Giles and Willow in the library figuring things out, Angel locked in a cage with the sun coming up, Xander and Cordelia in Buffy's house with one of the assassins, and Buffy fighting "Kendra, the Vampire Slayer".

New Characters: Caribbean TLC girl says she's Kendra, the Vampire Slayer.
Favorite Quote: "Why are they after me?" "'Cause you're the scurge of the underworld?" "I haven't been that scurgey lately." -Willow & Buffy
Mythology Lesson: DuLac wrote a book and created a cross that is the decoder. It contains a ritual to heal a sick vampire.
Demon Death Count: 1 vamp, bounty hunter/assassin dude
Human Death Count: Buffy's neighbor invites assassin maggot demon in for free make-up samples and gets herself dead


Ep. 10: What’s My Line? Part 2
Kendra, the other Slayer, takes this Slayer thing super-serious. Friends? What are friends? Kendra and Buffy clash on their individual ways of going about Slayer business while they try to find out what happened to Angel. He didn’t “meet the sun” (Sorry, True Blood term.) because the gross bar owner dragged him into the sewer so Spike could have him for his ritual. While Xander and Cordelia are trapped in Buffy’s basement hiding from the assassin made of maggots, their fighting builds up to the point where there is no other option but to kiss. There’s a fine line between love and hate?

Kendra talks about how her parents gave her to her Watcher when she was very young to start her training, but I thought a new Slayer wasn’t “activated” until the current Slayer dies. Buffy only died (for a minute) a year ago. Kendra is the same age as Buffy, so if Buffy hadn’t died until she was much older then Kendra would have just been a Slayer-in-Training her whole life? I’m very confused by this system.

Drusilla has had some fun torturing Angel, but now it’s time for the ritual. Buffy is taken there as a hostage so Spike can have her, interrupting the ritual. Kendra and the gang bust in to help Buffy and somehow everyone significant escapes alive. How convenient.
It’s all wrapped up with Willow and Oz being adorable together, Cordelia and Xander angry kissing again, and Buffy and Kendra having a good Slayer heart-to-heart. So… what, there’s just two Slayers now? That’s okay? Buffy lives in Sunnydale because there are a lot of vampires because of the Hellmouth, but is there another vampire hot spot in whatever Caribbean country Kendra is from? I need this explained!

New Characters: We get to know the assassins sent to kill Buffy a little better. Maggot Man, Police Poser.
Favorite Quote: “Man, that guy got major neck in his day!” -Xander about Angel
Mythology Lesson: The ritual to restore Drusilla to full health involves a new moon and her sire, Angel.
Demon Death Count: Several vamps, including assassins
Human Death Count: None.


Ep. 11: Ted
Buffy’s mom has a boyfriend! Ew! Old people kissing! Willow and Xander think he’s great, but Buffy understandably is weirded out and suspicious of Ted. And, after getting to know him at mini-golf, I am more than suspicious. That bitch be crazy!

But in other love stuff, Buffy is loving being Angel’s nursemaid bandaging his wounds, and Giles goes to check on Jenny the Techno-Pagan. She is still traumatized and wants nothing to do with him. Xander and “Cordy” are still in denial of what they’re doing together, refusing to acknowledge there’s something there in front of their friends, but then going to the utility closet to make out.
I hate Ted. Even if he didn’t have that extra bit of unnatural psycho freak stuff, he is so incredibly annoying and manipulative! I’m so glad Buffy kills him after she finds him in her room at night and he threatens her and smacks her real good. She feels really guilty about it though, so the gang investigates creepy Ted and finds drugs in his cookies that makes everyone chill and loving. While they’re investigating his address and marriage certificates going back all the way to 1957, Ted shows up in Buffy’s room again. Don’t worry, he’s not a zombie just a robot. She smashes his robo-head with his precious cast iron frying pan and everything’s back to normal. Oh, and Giles and Jenny/Ms. Calendar/the Techno-Pagan are back together. Smoochie smoochie.

New Characters: Ted, mom’s boyfriend.
Favorite Quote: “Vampires are creeps.” “Yes, that’s why one slays them.” -Buffy & Giles
Mythology Lesson: Ted lived in the 50’s. When he got sick, his wife left him. So he built a robo-Ted, brought his wife home and kept her there until she died and kept bringing women like her back to replace her.
Demon Death Count: 1 vamp.
Human Death Count: Ted


Thoughts So Far
We’re finally moving away from demon-of-the-week episodes and into longer story arcs, thank you. I love the Spike, Drusilla, Angel stuff. More of those weirdos, please. I’m enjoying the show, but I’m still eagerly anticipating more of the stuff I vaguely remember like Willow being a powerful witch, Willow being a lesbian, Buffy has a little sister?, Xander and Cordelia are together?, Faith is another Slayer? Well, I’m only half way through the second season, so I better learn to be patient while all those things unfold over the next five and a half seasons...